All Friendships Should Begin With One Question

It's officially wedding season, and all the dykes are in hiding trying to avoid the inevitable question, "Will you be my bridesmaid!?!" At least, I am.

I'm not unfriendly or party-shy, but only attempting to dodge one of my biggest fears: bridesmaid dresses. I have a picture of myself at age 10 wearing one such bridesmaid dress. My shoulders hang low, and I'm comfortably slouched, causing me to appear like a small boy awkwardly posing in his sister's dress.

My step sister is getting married in a few months. At first, she called to tell me I can wear whatever I want, as long as it's black. I asked, "So you mean I can wear pants, right?" She assured me, "Of course you can wear pants. I want everyone to be comfortable, and not have to spend a lot of money on an outfit." I was so happy to call her my step-sister, I didn't even care that I was going to have to fly to Texas on New Years Eve, miss out of every party, and fly back the day after the wedding. And now, all of a sudden, I'm supposed to not "stand out" too much. Apparently now I have "great legs", and would look stunning in a dress or at the very least, a tube top with pants. A TUBE TOP. TOOB.

This is why, as suggested by my friend Elspeth, all friendships should begin with one question, "Is there any chance we will stay friends long enough for you to get married, and if we do, what will I have to wear? I'm going to need that in writing."

Oh, and welcome to the blog. I'm Katy, and that thar other one is Allie.